When people poke your child...

At the park several boys called my daughter (8) some names.
She opted for crying and running away.
I found her theatrically seated by the lake, dripping and sniffing.


I was puzzled about what to say that would be useful.
Eventually after hugging quietly and some deep breathing, I said:
"Sweetheart, do you remember when C came to play? His family doesn't have any pets and how he was fascinated by the cats and wanted to play with them. Remember how he didn't know how to get them to pay him attention and so he poked them? And poked them. And poked them until they got up and left. Do you remember that?"
"Uhuh" was her damp response.
"Well, I think these little boys are fascinated by you and they don't know how to get your attention and so they are "poking" you by calling you a name. They just don't know how to stroke you and make you purr."
Damp giggle.
"They went poke and you exploded in tears. They are probably bewildered about what just happened."
Snort.
"By the way, what does it mean about you, if I call you broccoli nose?"
"Nothing"
"That's right, because the words people use tell us about them, not about you. How about stinky flea?"
"Nothing", but now she is smiling.
"How about pretty Peonie petal?"
"It means I'm pretty."
"Ah, no. That is a common misunderstanding. If you forget that their words tell us about them and take the ones you like to be true, then you will take the ones you don't like to be true too. Neither are. They are just words that people have used that reveal who they are."
Back to "hmmm".
"So what did they call you?"
"Catwoman."
I burst out laughing. "How appropriate! They set us up for this conversation! Do you know I love you?!"
We hugged and she dashed away to find her little flock of girlfriends.